The Mighty 3s headed to Locksbottom for a league fixture. Except confusingly, they play at Otford. They had beaten us comfortably earlier in the season.
The pitch was rather green. The views are lovely though.
Skinner won the toss and chose to bat. Young Frankie Homewood was making his league debut for us. Well, he was supposed to be, but had decided to go on a little drive around the M25 and arrived substantially late.
In an unusual twist to the batting order, we opened with Nigel and Andy Dampier.
It was a carefully thought out plan. In the earlier fixture, Locksbottom had scored lots of runs, and very quickly. The captain wanted to try and mirror that.
When we had scored 6 runs from the first 6 overs, Skinner was starting to doubt his decision. But it was not easy, the ball was not coming through at any pace, bounce was inconsistent, as was the bowling.
Baker took one in the ribs, but the old boy loves a bit of that roughty toughty stuff.
Gradually the pair got used to the conditions and started scoring well.
A straight six from Nigel started that off. The ball went some distance and over the head of our Chairman who was spectating at long on.
A later pull from Baker flew to the midwicket boundary. We suddenly noticed a young woman sun bathing there. All the players screamed a warning at her but she was wearing headphones and got a cricket ball in her midriff. Scandalously, none of our players went to check she was ok. It was one of the most disappointing moments of my captaincy at the club. I felt truly let down by the young lads. She looked very attractive, and if they aren’t going to seize that opportunity to look like valiant gallant knights charging to the rescue, what hope is there for the future of the club?
Damps started to enjoy himself and moved to his fifty with some hefty boundaries.
The opposition skipper was now bowling, and was very good. Baker holed out to him for 35.
Olly Patton was in at 3. His technique is wonderful but he got an inside edge to a great delivery and was caught behind for 1.
Keith Robertson almost got done by a Jaffa first ball. He tried to fetch a wide one from the young leggy and feathered behind. It was good to see him walk without waiting for the umpire. He had actually scored 2, but the scorebook shows him out for a duck. He hasn’t bribed the skipper enough to make it worthwhile to change it. So, a duck it will remain for eternity.
Horrocks was in and kept the scoring going well.
Damps was starting to look a bit fatigued and eventually was caught for 78. (Two of those runs are undoubtedly Keith’s, but see message above about the need for hard cash. 78 it is)
Guttsy was next to bat. Amusingly, the opposition skipper described the pair as “Gentlemen”. Horrible and Guttsy. Gentlemen!
Guttsy was run out for 9, bravely attempting a quick single.
Petty came in next and was 3 not out. Horrocks unbeaten on a valuable 34.
We had scored 197. A few short of what I had hoped for, but very dependable.
After tea we opened with Peter Trott. He swings the ball beautifully and is getting used to bowling up slopes and into the wind. He started well and continued in the same vein.
After his long innings Damps was ready and willing to open the bowling. Well, his mind and mouth said so, but the body was saying something different.
Fortunately young Frankie, who by now had only just arrived, was happy to stand in. He generates some genuine pace. He bowled well. His first 6 overs only went for 21 runs and he was unlucky not to get a wicket. You’d think a posh boy could afford some decent equipment but his boots fell apart while he was bowling. As Frankie’s butler was away cleaning the Rolls, Baker took over manservant duties and taped it all together.
Trott broke through, clean bowling the opener. His first 6 overs only went for 16.
Horrocks came on down the slope and was on the money straight away. He had a great shout for l.b.w.
Both batsmen admitted they thought it was out. We were all convinced, but the umpire was unmoved.
Shortly afterward Horrocks got his man after a great diving catch in the gully by Evan Hutchins.
His next wicket was also caught in the gully, this time by a leaping(ish) Guttsy. He later clean bowled their opener, with a quicker fuller ball and finished 9-4-23-3. Impressive stuff.
Evan Hutchins replaced Trott. His first over was too short but once he found his length he looked decent. 6-0-35-0
Guttsy was next into the attack and clean bowled one in his first over. Wicket maiden. He only conceded 5 runs in his 4 overs.
Patton was keeping exceptionally well. He has clearly learnt a lot from all those weeks watching Skinner behind the stumps. “Yep, that’s not how to do it” he has thought to himself.
By now Damps, had just about loosened up and was brought on. One of the youngsters repeatedly encouraged him by suggesting he needed some WKD. Nice banter, except he was thinking of WD40.
The oppo had realised they weren’t going to win and were now just seeing out the overs and looking to pick up batting points. One of their youngsters had a nice technique but was not playing any attacking shots.
From nowhere, he suddenly produced a glorious reverse sweep against Damps. It was executed perfectly and the ball flew down to third man for a boundary. It was joyous to see and every single person on both sides, absolutely loved it.
Oh, all except one person.
As night follows day, you knew what was coming next. The lad’s stumps went flying the very next ball and Damps let us know exactly what he thought of the youngster.
Trott returned to finish off his overs. He kept it tight, 9-1-22-1
Frankie got one over at the death but as they had an 11 year old batting (query league rules) he had to bowl spin. 7-0-21-0
Locksbottom finished on 132 for 6. A comfortable win for us.
It was a good sporting day for your match reporter. Maidstone won. Keely won. Josh broke a world record in the Emsley Carr mile. England beat the Argies at rugby and silenced a raucous crowd. Saka got a hat trick as we put 6 past the French.
But the highlight had to be the reverse sweep against Damps.